He Found Me in the Desert.
Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! Panic turned my mouth dry and my heart
collided with my stomach. Familiar buildings zoomed by and soon I was lost in
an unfamiliar area of town. I just knew I was dead or at least I was going to
be a victim of rape. I had no plan of escape and terror paralyzed me.
What do I do? What can
I say? No one had prepared me for this, there were no talks of stranger danger
or how to protect myself, and I was an ignorant victim.
The smell of old cologne and cigarettes are
still vivid memories, I can still see his slicked back red hair and his brown corduroy
jacket. I can recall his little brown MG car and where he was standing when I first
saw him that day, even after forty years.
It’s funny
how fear will emblazon a memory in your mind. I was almost thirteen and had
just gotten off the greyhound bus headed to my best friends for a weekend of
skating and meeting up with our boyfriends.
As I left the bus
station I looked around for the local transit bus to finish my journey. Never being
one that knows a stranger, I approached a nicely dressed man on the street and
asked him for the time. He asked where I was going and I happily obliged him
with all my fun weekend plans. Oh, I’m sure by now you are wondering what kind
of idiot I was, but wait, it even gets better.
After telling me I had
just missed my bus he gallantly volunteered to take me to my destination. Yes, I
did it, I got into his car and we were off. I have to admit I felt a few pangs
of alarm but I dismissed them because, after all, he presented himself as an
upstanding citizen, concerned for my safety.
Once we were in
route he asked me multiple inappropriate questions. At first I was perplexed
and thought maybe this was a joke but when he ignored my directions and we were
traveling the opposite way, I knew I was in real trouble.
He made a stop at a
fast food restaurant and asked if I was hungry, of course I told him no but he
went in anyway and brought out an extra order for me. In case you are
wondering, yes I sat in the car and missed my escape.
Reaching in the
back seat, he produced two bottles of beer and offered me one. I refused and
told him my friend would worry if I didn’t get there soon. That’s when his
devilish plan was finally realized. As he leaned towards me I gave out a little
scream and opened the car door.
By now you are
probably thinking that I took off running and got help, right? Sadly no, at his
promise to take me to my friends, I got back in the car. This is where I kick myself;
it’s hard for me to believe it, even now.
He did eventually drop
me off unharmed and I walked into my friend’s house as he sped off down the
road. Bawling, I told everything to my friend’s mom and she scolded me on the
dangers of hitch hiking.
Before you judge me
and think I was one of the most brainless girls on the planet, (I often think
that myself), in my defense I was twelve and was never taught stranger safety before
this. My brothers often hitch hiked and my mom frequently picked strangers up. We
even hosted people in our home, most of them we really didn’t know very well.
This is not the end
of the story. Later that evening, while skating with my friends, I happened to
notice the same man sitting at a table in a dark corner, watching my every move.
He quickly raced out the door when he saw me point him out to the rink owner. The
memory still makes me shudder.
When I think of all
my near misses and narrow escapes, I am humbled. Time and time again God has
lovingly rescued me. Stupid decisions and just plain rebellious living has put
me in some sticky situations to say the least. How often have I swiped my brow
with the back of my hand only then to realize God’s all encompassing hand on my
life?
Jeremiah 31:2-3
says this, “This is the way God put it: They found grace out in the desert,
these people who survived the killing. Israel, out looking for a place to rest,
met God out looking for them!” God told them, “I’ve never quit loving you and
never will. Expect love, love and more love!” (MSG)
Oh how I love this
verse! Many times when I make mistakes
and suffer consequences, I think I just got what I deserve. Thank you Father
that there is grace in the desert. Thank you that I am valuable to you and you
are out looking for me, even when I am distracted.
We all have
memories that point their fingers at us from the dark corners and say, “This is
your fault, you brought it on yourself now you have to pay. You are not fit to
be loved or forgiven.”
If you are out
looking for that place to rest, just know that your heavenly Father has never
given up the search for you and will never stop loving you. Point your finger
right back at those accusing thoughts and don’t allow them to keep you
wandering in the wasteland.
Expect love, love
and more love. He’s our Father, He loves us, that’s what He does.
