Where do I fit In?

Dammit Angey

   Beads of sweat formed on my brow as I nervously chewed my finger nails. Waiting to hear my name being yelled through the house was torturous. “Larry, Kenny, Chucky, Davey, Ricky, dammit Angey, get in here!”

   I come from a large family, five brothers to be precise. Sometimes being the only girl made it hard to know where I fit within this loud, rowdy, society of boys. Being so far down the sibling list only made things worse, when my mom called for a kid she usually went through the whole list before she found the one she wanted. So “dammit Angey” could have easily become my nickname.

   Feeling like a part of the family didn’t always come easy. As the only girl I didn't have a lot in common with the five boys. I was all Barbies, babies and easy bake oven; they were all cars, karate, and blowing things up. It seemed my mom was more accustomed to boys so she wasn't sure how to handle the drama and emotions that goes along with raising a girl. I knew they were my family but the camaraderie that goes along with the privilege was just not there.

   Have you ever been unsure if you “fit in” as a Christian? Maybe your first reaction towards someone was not out of love, or temptation got the best of you and now your reputation is in jeopardy.   Do you feel like your name is way down the list of importance? What is the pronoun you would put at the beginning of your name? Sometimes we can even feel like an outsider because we don’t have much in common with our brothers and sisters.

   Zephaniah 3:17 says, “The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.”

Ephesians 2:4-5 says, “But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions-it is by grace you have been saved.”

   Know this- God loves you exactly the way you are, “even when we were dead in transgressions.” He takes “great delight” in you. He even sings you your own special love song, how great is that?

   Just because you don’t always feel accepted doesn’t change the truth that no one in history could love and cherish you the way God does. He calls you lovely, mighty, beautiful, important, smart, healthy, blessed, desired, dear children and his own; the list could go on and on.

   When those accusatory lies sneak into your head, when negative emotions convince you that you are a big nobody, remind yourself that you are the sweetheart of God himself. You are the apple of his eye and there is nothing more important to him than you. You have a place and it fits you perfectly.

Top L-R Kenny, me, Larry
Davey,Rickey, Chucky

 L to R
Davey, me, Ricky

Here's Chucky

Kenny

Larry, me, Ricky